Generation Sex

You know what costs 50p/minute? Competition phonelines! You know what else? 'Phoning hospital patients? Get outta here! Oh no, wait, that's true. Yes, for a ludicrous amount, I could telephone sickly brother in hospital, which I don't really think is fair (can't use mobile phones for high possibility of messing up equipment). What tha hell woulda poor family do?

Dude!

In my first class on Thursday, where I am 100% of the male population, I was informed that 61% counts as a 2.1 grade for scores (university rankings are 1st, 2.1, 2.2, 3rd, fail, in that order), which prompted me to think for one minute. Add the 68...I was quietly saying, which gives...61%. "Dude, sweet!" I instantly said, thus meaning that, even without doing the 120 (!) recommended hours study (I did about 10, if that), I did good. Truly excellent. But what else is excellent? The New Order boxset, Retro, which cost me a pound over £30 and is full of the good stuff from the 80s. Rock on!

There was only one previous owner: James Bond!

In the continuing saga of angry, or not, most of my week's timetable has been condensed into two days. With a two-hour slot taking up Chewsday, a lesson which I was unaware that started next week (prompting me to walk all the way from the Liverpool Royal hospital to Mount Pleasant, find out it's not on, then to go back - damn), I have five hours of 'stuff' on a Thursday, then three hours on Friday, giving me a total of seventeen hours study (of course).

I want rest. Before I have even started.

Screwy NHS

Man, I hate to see those close to me in pain. Especially Ray. He was admitted recently for the fact that he is turning yellow (literally) as his liver is producing too much bile. So, come Tuesday, he had a camera (or something) shoved down his throat so he could have something put into his liver. Except...there was blockage, so they had to do something today. In hideous pain, as he recalled. Instead of receiving local anesthetic, instead of sedation, he was given very little painkiller. So he was in extreme pain every time he breathed. When he came out, I felt too miserable, mainly for the fact that he's had so much shit to put up with since he was 16 and the fact that I merely have only one of his conditions (although I fear I may get more). I don't know how many things are wrong with him, but I hope he pulls through. And he's still got to suffer some stupid shit. And I still feel guilty. Grr.

You can't read, but get well soon, Ray.

In The Country

Ooh. Takin' Japanese lessons (either that or French, really). At the horrifically late time of 1800-2000 on Tuesdays, I do hope that I can grasp that language. I mainly seem to be focused on learning the writing, merely for the love of the calligraphy. But then, what? Onto Indian writings? Arabian? Chinese? Somewhere else? All too much for me to see, ye. Hee? Oh well. Man, I should be playing Earthworm Jim again.

Ducks? Fish? What kind of music is that?

Wooh! Flat-screen monitor (for shit specificationed PC) makes all ultra-sharp, giving me the false impression that the PC is actually better. But enough. Whilst tramping around Liverpool yesterday, I overheard some Southerners whilst heading towards shops that clothe you (clothes shops). One of 'em said, "Oh, they've got a Marks & Spencer here,", probably assuming that i) 'Northeners' haven't heard of such conventional shops like Marks and Spencers (it's only Waitrose we don't get, plus some other crap things), ii) they came to a new city hoping that their favourite stores where there, or iii) they are confused by globalisation. I believe that ii) was the real situation, and I comment upon that - why the fuck do people go to a different place to go into all their favourite places? Aren't you supposed to savour delights of the new? I guess these are the type of people who don't realise that globalisation is actually a bad thing. Bunch o' 'tards.

High atop the mountain

...is someone playing 'Songs of Love' by The Divine Comedy, since it is the Father Ted theme tune. Mmm? My younger brother was able to borrow a PC monitor from his school (although it's only 14 bloody inches - I want 17!) that hurts your eyes to look at. But it does allow for me to play RollerCoaster Tycoon 2, in which I can amazingly recreate Southport Pleasureland. If you want to. I couldn't find any cans of Guiness in the fridge, though.

Warp-speed

No monitor. In university typing up. Thursday was an odd day, for I was sedated to be examined (which still hurt, come to think). Afterwards, felt sick, threw up, immediately felt better, went home, then to bed for three hours (which felt like the best sleep I've had for absolutely ages, regardless of being so short. I dreamt that I've taken a great fancy to Guiness, as 'it's good for you', so I might try some now. More of this later.

Orffer

Send me to the future, right, where illness doth not plague individuals so easily. That way, I would be able to get a real job that would enable me to cope with real stress, rather than the fake stuff that can be easily ignored at the fairground. Which is where I suppose my next stoodent job will come from, no being spoilt for me (but then, being spoilt is something of a twat thing). And a bit of exercise couldn't hurt either, though it will. I feel ill.

Send off

I got 'The Maxx' in the post today, something for me to waste two hours.

Ow! My head hurts! That made about as much sense as a flannel falling through open windows. It made less sense than ÆON Flux, which is saying something.

Angst Alert!

Dear Agony Aunt,

Feeling anti-social, I decided to buy myself a mobile phone. Anyway, cut a long story short, I'm now on a boat as a Spy (for which country I cannot tell) infiltrating what seems to be the greatest terrorist threat ever posed to the modern world. Any advice?

Seriously though, I should get a mobile phone. It's just easier, fer sure. As long as it has lots of games on it and is the latest piece of technology. And doesn't cost a bomb. Should the above situation happen, ah well.

Dirge Society Three

Uuugh. 200B.P.M. hurts on DDR Euromix 2. I won't do again until I exercise. Meanwhile, not another place too far, I saw LOTR: The Two Towers again. This time, whilst watching it, I allow myself to pay attention to everything else other than the really long storyline. At least you can plan when to go to the toilet, at the boring parts. It's quite interesting to see how the battered Orcs look from a distance; it's such a kewl programme them's producers use for the film. God, I sound like a nerd-a-thon. I also want to be in a band, which has a bongo player, an acoustic guitar player and a double bass player. That'd be a band and a half.

C.A.K.E.

Certainly, then: as I haven't visited for a while, I decided to go to my aunt's house to celebrate my cousin's 3rd birthday. Of course, he isn't quite at the same intellectual level for conversation, so I didn't expect much to occur. Except for the fact that when I got there, they
had
rented
a
bouncy castle. Somehow fitted into one of their (my aunt and uncle) empty front room (they haven't lived in the house long at all), it was adult friendly. Yeah, it knacker'd me out, and I spent more time on it than most of the other children, but you cannot imagine the fun being able to do the Tajiri thing (a handspring into the side, then jumping back). Woooh. I want one for my birthday. Another thing: I'm falling over myself, since I've just hit a wall of nothingness. I got confused in the car on the way home and questioned existence. Then I thought about being a wrestler again.

That was so last year, mate

In March there was Fight Club. In April there was a full frontflip with no hands and a factory job. In May there was catering work at the fairground and being pessimistic about England in the world cup. In June there were exams, my birthday, my other's birthday, and started 'doing the rides' at the fair. In July, children thought I was scary, I turned down a holiday to Spain and derailed a train. In August, I met the guy from Space; I think that was it. In September, I became a man and went to University - from home, and contemplated the difficulties of English Language. In October, there was a new cinema, I plonked around a cold Birkenhead for an hour and went to a fantabulous wrestling event. In November, I cycled in the dark, saw 28 Days Later, and Digitiser once again became the best games mag around. In December, there was no buying games for a week, the easiest exams I have ever taken part in, theorised true Communism (and told no-one about it), and failed to celebrate New Year again. Forgot first two months, no blog archive.

What's in the box?

I buy the Roots Manuva album 'Run Come Save Me', there's 2NA Fish. I buy the Blackalicious album 'Blazing Arrow', there's 2NA. I buy the J5 album 'Power In Numbers', there's 2NA. Is there any album hip-hop he won't do? Alright, that's only three albums, but they are the last three hip-hop albums I bought. Therefore...blah. In other opinions of the not-so-crazee, I must conclude that the original of Planet of the Apes, the one with Charleton Heston in it, is far better than the more recent one. It's darker, nastier, and seems to highlight racial prejudice to a far greater extent, although there aren't any people who aren't white. The modern version lacked an awful lot. Something I couldn't explain.

Songs of the Year 2002

Am I late? Does it matter?

1) Nobody Likes You (When You're Dead) - Zombina and the Skeletones
2) Nice Weather For Ducks - Lemon Jelly
3) Relief - Blackalicious
4) Do It Again - Queens of the Stone Age
5) It's In Our Hands - Bjork
6) Walkie Talkie - DJ Shadow
7) Dirrrty - Christina Aguilera and Redman (alright, it's not from this year, but I like)
8) Liberate - Disturbed
9) Witness the Pitness - MC Pitman (spoof artist - take on Witness the Bitness by Roots Manuva)
10) Thin Line - Jurassic 5 featuring Nelly Furtado

Funk Soldier

I think I might start jogging. Say...from my house, to Pontin's, then back every morn. Sounds reasonable enough. It would do if I had trainers capable of living up to the challenge. Therefore, new trainers are needed, specifically for running (and not those that will fall apart so easily). Erm, what else? My Dad finally bought Pro Evolution Soccer 2 for I after forgetting it for Christmas Day (but since it's within the twelve days of Christmas, I'll let him off). And it's ruddy good.