Flavour of the Month: cheese

I got Shenmue II, but it just sits there, laughing. 'You can't play me until you finished the first one', it chuckles. I spent about 45 minutes getting Disc 3 up and running as well. For about £34.77, I got:

Shenmue II (£29.99)
Playnation (£2.99)
-Free DVD of Dominion Tank Police
Kerrang! (£1.79)
-Free 22-track music CD

5 for the price of 3. Not bad. I will get my sweet revenge on Blacks when the time comes. Oh yes. I will.

'Shake your rump-a!'

I believe I will get the second Appleseed book as well. Should I be thinking about Christmas presents? I can't afford them. I think. Today, I had a thought about how good the next new consoles will be. The graphics will smell very tasty indeed! About this good:

One day.

'Let's get sweaty' says Ryo from Shenmue.

I think I'll get Shenmue II now. On Thursday. Before many. If you walked into the shop, probably any shop, even Spar, you will see Shenmue II. There. No hype. No 'Sequel to the (apparently) best game ever!' sign. It's JUST THERE. By that copy of Headhunter, which recieved more attention. £30 for 3 discs. It'd better last. And work on my machine.

Get that game above from this hove. Lovely jubberly.

Juxtopolisation is probably spelt wrong

I really wish I had another job now. Ah well. Things don't last forever. Or very long at all, in my case. I got my Dreamcast (sort of) working, so I can happily (try) and play Shenmue now.

I'm too nice

No, it looks like I couldn't be bothered with the Human Rights Place. Yet. I'm not going to sue, I'm too nice for that - I'm merely going to humiliate. Which is a good idea, as I won't be seen as a bad guy then.

WHY?!?

Knowing my bad porn related incident that happened within the last 2 months, it was just great the darksyphid had to post that picture. And what with me sending the game to him, I decided to have another crack at the game.

Plan B

I will screw that guy who got me fired so deep into the ground. I will fone the Human Rights House on Monday, explain story, they'll argue with Blacks (and probably win), I'll get apologised to by that sonnovabitch who wrongly fired me, then... sue my him for £1,000! That's what he gets. Not exactly a princely sum, but it has to be a honest figure. 'I was planning to get that much from the job anyway' I'll say in court. That'll learn 'im.

I don't believe you!

I got fired! In a none-porn related incident which I cannot actually believe! What did I do? Hurt someone? Break something? Slack?

I asked for a drink. By saying 'If this is nobodies, can I have this drink?' gets me fired. The Human Rights Brigade shall hear of this!

Relish the thought

I get first ever pay cheque/check/mate on Thursday. What shall it be spent on? I owe some, sadly.

Note the style, probably ripped off somewhere:
-Irrelevant title
-Irrelevant picture
-Article of actual print

I would also use this pointless article to give thanks to Sega's Typing of the Dead, which has helped me incredibly in my typing skills. I can type many things without looking at the keyboard, although finger placement ON THE KEYBOARD AND NO-WHERE ELSE needs improvement.

"A body made of a cornish pasty, with the wings made out of holly and a raisin for a head which occasionally sets on fire"

It's a terrible addiction. I need help.

Yes, these online tests are a passing fad. If there's something that most internet people would do, then it's:
-Making some pointless online test that many will do
-Filling out these pointless tests, then posting the results on your weblog*

* Results according to me. Probably 52% correct. As Vic Reeves said: "88% of statistics are made up on the spot", according to some old Guiness ad.

Meanwhile, not far away...

Regarding the Q Music Awards 2001, here's John Lydon (Sex Pistols) acceptance speech in full (apparently):

"Shut up! I've got a few words for you. Hello! This is the working class of England - I am one of them. And all you posh bastards out there, too busy doing your fucking imitations, know where it comes from. [Points to screen behind him] The real deal. Me. I want to say thank you to my family and friends. Stand up and let them know what a real Arsenal looks like!... Johny bettah win one?...Eh, Johny win one! Who wants it? Cos, come on, it don't mean much to me...[Off microphone to heckler] Eh? You're a wanker [Point to Keith Allen] You didn't do the 100 Club pres conference. You turd! Boo! One person I would like to say hello is Kate Bush - I love you, your music is fucking brilliant. You know what, Kate - we are worthy! That's enough from me. Now let's get pissed. Peace off."

Beautiful.

Sealed in some crude oil hole

Hours of nothingness can be wasted by you. Some absolute gems are found:

The Official site of Tango (as if there is an unofficial one) which contains a right royal rip-off of Jet Set Willy. Featuring the doll off the Tango ads, named GoTan. Make sure you get the help pack so you can actually complete the game.

Elastomania site has a game that many enjoyed in the library of KGV. Certainly if anyone got caught. Like myself. This game would be one of the most addictive you have played in a good while.

Best ever

The best ever website in the world. Run here. Apparently features over 100 terrabytes* of info. Including wrestlecrap.com, which closed down, a while ago.

* - a terrabyte is 1000 gigs. Or well over 1,000,000,000,000 bytes of info. Ouch!

Could you please tell me how to get...

On this test, my persona of a Sesame Street character is... Ernie! Honestly, I'm sure the 'k-k-k-k' of Bert would've suited me more.

He'll be back. He always is.

Having still not seen Harry Potter, or not buying any merchandise (my younger brother has the books, that's it), I feel a little proud. Granted, I don't actually buy merchandise, but I wasn't a sucker for hype, baby! I couldn't afford it either.

Two posts whilst in college at separate hours? Somebody stop me!

Jumping Jehovah's Witness'

Listen good: I'm no longer excited by Christmas. Do fanciful items no longer tickle my fancy? I am no more content with items of such petty enjoyment (of course not - I'm still hankering for a new games system, videos, CDs...)? Should I be more content with reaching my 'inner self'? Wait, I'm not ready for that crazy maze yet - I'm only 17.

Of course, I could become some sort of religious figure by joining a monkery or to become a priest - anyone can become a priest - but I'll just sit fine until I no longer enjoy things of today. Huh, as if I'll ever get bored of animation.

The Big Valbowski

Furry art's a great idea. Lacking various amounts of artistic talent and a good scanner never stopped me doing this!

Now, if only Reblogger/replacements were available...

Bored

Being 'the new guy' at my place of work was quite boring for my first day, to approach people saying "D'you need any help?" and NOT awaiting the reply of "Yes" was quite repetitive. However, the staff are alright (Justin - like Reiss Colin in nearly every way; Dan - old school associate; Jo - fine-lookin' girl who was very nice; the rest - no bother) and the pay is quite low, but a job's a job and it's paid due to age. Sadly.

Death by Confusion

A psychology lesson. Friday afternoon. Tiredness sets in. I ask the question 'Sir, has anyone ever screamed and then jumped out of the window in confusion?' He seemed pretty miffed himself(accompanied by laughter from the class).

Possible? I hope not. There are so many things I ponder upon, thinking of all possibilities and considerations. It hurts. I have so many things to tell the world I don't know how. I usually forget them in a minute anyway. This is some old thing from last year, but it's still valid. I'm sure you can die from confusion. Not to be laughed at.

Congratulations is a long word

I got a job! Barely paid to the extreme, but it's something. Now I will win! Of course, £3.18 may not last long, but it's for the Curriculum Vitae.

'cause the 'eard hurts I f'ace

Award ceremony! Thank you, thank you, for I'm going to get bored for 2 hours tomorrow. For my 'courage' taking on the Duke of Edinburgh Silver; a YEAR later than everyone else who actually completed the whole damn thing. Y'know, just because I betrayed Christ the King (or so they made it out to be) doesn't mean they don't need to tell me about getting something important. Screw you, Christ the King.

At least it gives me an excuse for not doing my Psychology homework, which I was given a week for.
"Where's your homework?" They'll say.
"I was getting an award" I'll say.
"Not good enough."

I tell you, Ben Miller/Stiller never had homework after HIS award ceremony. And mine's harder to get.

I'm a thief, oh yes I am, I can and I'll always get away with it



Why the hell do I bother?



If only I were a girl. Do I need to be doing this, Jim? I need sleep.

Play no evil

I haven't seen 'Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone' yet (although I can't be blamed; it's not supposed to be out), but from what I believe, I think it would be rather gothic and insecure, not taking heed from trailers. That is as I always listened to Tool's 'Lateralus' album all the time when I read it, giving a mysterious, cold but atmospheric approach to the book. Not, apparently, a 'Gothic Disneyworld', which makes me shudder a little.

Pain

What happened in NYC? It reminds me of the France Concorde disaster, except most details are very sketchy. What a bitch.

Dudley Death Drop

Where the hell does 'he' get all his crazy websites from? Kinda makes me feel isolated. Anyway, on the test that 'he' found out about, I got a dull 48/100.

'You are a casual weblogger. You only blog when you have nothing better to do, which is not very often. There's nothing wrong with that. But if you'd post a little more often, you'd make your readers very happy.' Thanks for little, blog quiz.

Gettin' rowdy

Now that's a right needle in a haystack: I have ANOTHER job interview. If that wasn't enough, it's on the same day as the other one. How bizarre. It's for an 'outdoor experience' type shop, namely 'Blacks'. I'd honestly choose that job, but if I also get into the situation of choosing a job, I'd be going mad. Ha. Ha ha. HA HA (ahem).

Other thing on the agenda is that I saw some ECW fights for the first time, although honestly they weren't as good as WWF. Although it is more intense (thus more dangerous), it lacks something. Namely Psychology. Anyway, must escape now. Cheerio.

Harry Pothead: The philosipher philospher Sorcerer's Stoned

'To see a new film because of the hype' - last time was for Star Wars: Episode 1. Of course, I won't want to see this straight away - screaming kids and such. I'm used to the small crowds (less than 30). Relaxed, with friends and almost private (add those punsters that 'don't get it' for the whole experience). It costs too much too, for Christ's sake - and everybody knows the plot.

Tough move, mate

Yesterday, Pete M had a copy of a 'final wrap' version of 'Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back'. I was able to borrow it. It works. All seems well, until 8 minutes. My brain comes into activation and screams 'Don't watch that film here! Watch it at the cinema with many others who haven't seen it!' - which is why I haven't watched further than those 8 minutes. Here's the problem:
- do I watch it, thus being able to discuss the film with about 3 other people who have seen it, but completely ruin the cinema experience?
- do I not watch it, pissing off the guy who lent it me, probably get it ruined by another who has seen it, but otherwise make the cinema experience true?
Tough choice! I'll probably be one of few in Britain who saw it before everyone else, but at some cost. My, my, my, said the spider to the fly...

"Spooooooooonnnn!!!"

Wow, System Shock II is one fantastic game. So much RPG-ness. Deux Ex, a slap on the face with a wet fish for the blatant plagiarism you have performed. Of course, the gaming world has many unfounded beauties, which so many would like to hunt down but are always pipped to the post. Like Christmas NiGHTS. Anyway, I have played GTA3 and it is a damn good game. Huge. However, my palate is not 100% satisfied; when I played GTA: 1969 I never played the first version much after that. It wasn't British. I'd like to see a new version set in the underworld of Liverpool, so much fun would be had then. Or another English City. Geezer.

Invasion!

Proposal: 8 of the people in college will have a wrestling match. OK, we all know each other, but there's a good idea of what cool will happen. If we ever get permission, materials and the people we wished for. Competitors include myself, Ray(naturally), Wyl M(a 9-stone monster who could take anything; trained in 2 martial arts), Pete M(judo black belt, good fighter), Chris B(someone who did karate), Chris W(a boxer who is 5th best in the country for his age), possibly Trendy Rob(it's Robin), and another. Of course, this would be staged, but it would be good for a laugh and in the name of charity.

Rabbit, rabbit, rabbit, rabbit!

I wanted to reconnect my scanner and put up my own art in the stylee of this guy. I haven't found it yet [takes a look in the draw]. Found it! I'll connect it later.

Up a little...down a little...ooh...there it is. Can you fix it, Mr. Plumber?

Let's face it. I cannot be bothered usually to stay up until 2:00AM, unless there's something so amazing it must be done. Which never happens (apart from parties and such). So, I decided to have the 'Animation Marathon' on C4 recorded and from what I've seen it is quite good. It included something by Adam & Joe, a terrible confession of Boy George (that he never watched cartoons as a child, the thespian!) and something by the guy who helped do Rex the Runt. Marvellous. 3 hours of absolute crap. Thank God Adam & Joe like cartoons as much, or more, than I. I salute you, kings of animation.

Max Hardcore i--------------------s my name!

Ah, juvenility catches up with me. Again. I've yet to watch the tapes I've found though. Today, I played in the nearest playground with other 'kids' my age (17-18) doing flips and all that. Nobody has a low mental age; most people (me excluded) were some of the smartest people. And a bath! God.....that......feels......so.......good........aahhhh!

However, something was odd. In the bath, listening to Radio1, I heard a mix of Missy Elliot's 'Get ur freak on' and Nirvana's 'Smells like Teen Spirit'. That sounded incredibly confusing! I'd better just think of other mixes that might soothe me. I can't.

Tragedy: The new comedy

A new game show has started on ITV1. It is called 'Shafted'. Try to calm down from the absolute stupidity and hilarity of that name. Ready? OK, Robert Kilroy-Silk (better call him Kilroy) hosts the show and questions of low difficulty are asked. The first part of the question is asked like 'Who sung about a shoe...' which then one of the contestants then bets some money. Whoever bets the highest gets to answer, but they risk losing that money. Anyway, at the end of each round, with some complex ideas, Kilroy tells the contestant 'I'm sorry, you've been shafted!'. I await the day when a victim of rape comes on and hears that, bursting out into tears, then suing the gimp for all he's worth.

Oh No

I've just realised (God, I'm slow) how this Christmas, we have Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings to look forward to. The perfect idea is not to have a film released in between these two, like 'Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back'. Damnit, that really sucks. I wonder if any cinema will have this (probably) magnificent film at all?

Note the addition of a message board, just like everyone else. Ever.

Fried Children

Amazin'! I have been able to find some old tapes in the cupboard. Three Transformers ones, including 'The return of Optimus Prime'; a He-Man tape, also grand and a Thundercats tape! Life is good. Except for filling in that UCAS form.

In your face, Wornstrom

3-1! Manchester Utd. never saw that one coming. A deserved 3-1 victory for the best* team in the country.

*-at time of writing.

Wassup my arse?

Great combination of two phrases.

I GOT AN INTERVIEW FOR SAINSBURY'S!!! AAAAGGHAHAHAHHA! Let me get a job! Now I'll be able to BUY THINGS! Now I won't have to live off lunch money! Now I can finally get new clothes! Oh God it's great.
(and I probably won't get the job after all. Or will I? I'll be optimistic for now)